Opinion | Leave North Morlan alone

Emma Reith
Art Director
@reithemma

Living in the North Morlan Residence Hall (NoMo) made us the people we are today. If it weren’t for the white-washed concrete walls, questionable carpet stains and generally haunted atmosphere of NoMo, we genuinely don’t know who we would be.

NoMo gets a bad reputation for looking like a store-brand Motel 6. When we toured it before our freshman year, our moms said, “I hope to God you don’t live in this place.” When we got assigned there, we emailed the university to ask if they made a mistake. There was no mistake. We did live in that place and, to our surprise, it was awesome.

Kali Hoffman
Photo Editor
@kalimhoffman

We’re not going to sit here and try to convince anyone that NoMo is the swankiest dorm. It’s arguably the ugliest place on campus (except for the common area which got a Pimp-My-Lounge makeover in 2017 complete with puffy couches). It lives in the shadow of South Morlan’s decent lighting, private bathrooms and brightly colored doors. Still, besides the obvious perks of having only two people to a room and being so far out of the way that nobody really cares what goes on over there, NoMo has more character than any of the other residence halls combined.

Everyone who lived in NoMo is united through common experience. Being kept up until 1 a.m., because booming music and the smoke of illicit substances flowing through the vent system, builds character. Being able to wirelessly print 12 identical pictures of Lady Gaga to your neighbor’s printer and hear them yell, “What is going on?” through the paper-thin walls is a once in a lifetime experience. If you’re lucky, you get to see a tree outside your window. If you’re extra lucky, you get a view of the Harris apartments.

You also have your own special parking lot, so you can move in and out in less than 30 minutes if you really have your act together. And not having access to an elevator means your calves get super toned.

The insulation system is absolutely magnificent. When you wake up in a sweaty panic after having a stress dream, all you have to do is touch the cold stone walls to both cool yourself down and shock yourself back into reality.

The sinks are separate from the bathroom, so you can still do your entire skincare routine even if you’re suitemate and their “friend” are taking a questionably long time in the shower.

The private courtyard is an ideal place to cry on the phone to your mom, reconnect with your long distance boyfriend or sit for three hours when you inevitably get locked out and can’t buy a new ID card because you spent your last $10 at Starbucks.

You even have the option to keep your door open and sit in the walkway in a lawn chair to admire your concrete kingdom – a luxury not available to students in other dorms. Nobody ever keeps their door open though because that’s scary. Also, nobody ever sits outside in a lawn chair because that’s weird and bugs live outside (ew).

Overall, NoMo has a rustic charm that makes it a one of a kind living experience. In the same way people like to go camping, NoMo combines the nostalgic comfort of home and the ever-present fear of living in an unpredictable, hostile environment.